Thursday, September 19, 2013

Kryssy's Saving Series Part 4- Christmas Shopping is ALL the time.

So it's September....fall. Pumpkin spice everything (yum!) and my baby is due in about 5 weeks. So how jealous does it make you to know that I am almost completely done with my Christmas shopping? Oh.....the envy is palpable!

I LOVE Christmas. I love the food, the constant baking to make the food, the smells of it, how a house is all warm when you walk into it, the Christmas lights, and being able to shower the people you love with presents. What I don't love is stressing about Christmas. So my husband and I decided we just weren't going to do that. We spent three Christmases in a row with him being deployed to some country in the Middle East (play "I'll be home for Christmas," around me and I will basically burst into tears as soon as I hear it), so when we finally had a family Christmas together in 2011, our priorities weren't so much about stressing about everything because we were just so happy to have our family together! And do you have any idea how much fun Black Friday shopping is when you aren't going out with some die hard agenda, but just checking out the sales for funsies? I buy more stuff for myself on Black Friday (which is ultimately a present from Santa, I guess) than buying presents for other people because I've already gotten most of the Christmas shopping done. So by the time Black Friday rolls around- we get to kick back and enjoy all the little things that makes the Holidays so much fun, but are rarely ever enjoyed (there is a reason why Christmas is the time of year when suicide rates skyrocket.). Stop and smell the gingerbread and mulled cider, people!

So my first tip is not to really set out and say "I'm going Christmas shopping today!" because that crap still puts way too much pressure on you and then the pressure of finding a gift, any gift so you can cross someone's name off of your to do list- just makes it not fun and keeps you from finding a great gift at a good price. By looking year round for presents- it's more so one of those where if I'm browsing the clearance section of a store or notice something awesome on one of my online shopping sites (like groupon, rue la la, bourbon and boots or zulilly) and something jumps out at me that makes me go "Hmm....that's interesting and so and so would like that...." I can just pick it up and go (or if I'm online- check for checkout promo codes or see if there is another site selling the same thing for cheaper). Without that pressure, I am able to use my head to make sure it's not just crappy gift that is going to get re-gifted or disgarded and make sure I'm not breaking the bank. The whole idea of giving a gift (besides it representing the gifts given to Baby Jesus and whatever pagan traditions it was jacked from as well), is to show your love for someone with a little token of your affection. And as much as I love to buy presents for my family, I know none of them would want me to break the bank just to give them a present.

Another thing is to have a signature present- takes the pressure off of you because people are expecting this present. My grandmother always gets her grandkids and great grandkids a really nice Christmas ornament. I have always gotten a silver bell, I think (...not sure if I totally remember) my sister gets a crystal ornament from Waterford, my son gets a Lenox ornament in the shape of a toy. So taking a cue from her, every year I give my parents and grandparents a calendar filled with pictures of my family (mostly my son...he is who everyone wants to see). They come to expect it now and it's easy to do. We go to snapfish  or shutterfly (whichever has the best promos- by the way if you do mycokerewards, you can use your points to get credit at shutterfly), go through our pictures and order our calendars. With our families living far away from us- they get a year to look at Loki's cute little face. We usually do some sort of picture gift, too. Like a nice picture of the family or of Loki in a frame. Pictures are always a hit and if you hit up the clearance sales at various stores (I prefer Target, Homegoods, and TJ Maxx when I'm hunting for cheap frames), you can find really pretty frames.

Stocking stuffers- Kiel and I decided to do an every other year sort of thing when it came to the holidays. One year we stay home and invite our family to see us, the next year we go back east. So of course when our family comes out to see us, they get a stocking. Now since the calendars tend to be the big gift everyone wants and our families are flying out to see us- we get them a bunch of little presents (and maybe one that is their "big present") and we fit it in their stockings so it doesn't take up a lot of room (if we are traveling, we ship the gifts out before hand in flat rate boxes to Kiel's parent's house). Also, if your families are like ours- our parents and grandparents seem to basically have just about everything...IN THE WORLD. So my advice is to look for something quirky, original and maybe even funny. Last year, I found a great deal on Diamond Candles so we bought three of 'em and gave them to our family members. At Pier 1, I found a bunch of cute manicure kits and gave those away as presents, too. Just because it is a clearance item doesn't mean that it's a sucky gift. A gift that is personal or shows that you picked it out with them in mind, really is the important part....except with kids. And we all know that when it comes to presents- the focus is mainly on the kids, not the adults.

KIDS- Granted- I'm not at that part in my kid's life where it's all about a "it" toy. But I do know what my son likes and I have an entire year to look for it and hide it in my house (praying he doesn't stumble upon it). Those reward coupons from Toys R Us? All over it. When I happen to be somewhere with a Five Below- going crazy (and not just for the kids...my husband could literally buy out the whole store- he loves that place). Clearance at Target? I am rummaging through that like a dumpster diver. And when I see something online that I know is a good price- I buy that, too! And while we are on the topic- kids really do have a shit ton of toys, so maybe make a tradition out of having them go through their toys and pick out ones that they don't really play with to give to less fortunate kids. It's a good lesson for children and it's less shit for you to step on when their rooms are messy. Win/win!

Now- just because I shop all year long, doesn't mean I don't need extra money for buying stuff at Christmas. We LOVE to enjoy the holidays which means money for baking, money for Christmas lights (my husband sees it as a neighborhood competition) and money for Black Friday shopping (yes it tends to be mostly presents Kiel and I buy for ourselves or each other, but whatever. Deals are sometimes good). SOOOOO here is my advice for having money a Christmas (DISCLAIMER: I am not a financial expert- I am just a woman that really doesn't like to stress about money. Financial security is a type of security that just makes life easier, in my opinion); after you get your tax refund (as this is a time when people tend to get a lump sum of money, this could also be when certain active duty service members get their annual re-enlistment money)- take a chunk of that money (we do about 2,000 to be on the safe side as I like to over estimate things when it involves money). Put that money into a CD (certificate of deposit) that will mature around early/mid November- which you should be able to do online if you utilize online services with your bank . Now that money is locked in that CD. You won't be able touch it until it matures and it will mature right around the time you will need it. And not only is it sitting there, safe and ready to make your holidays less stressful- but it will gaining interest and making money for you while it sits there. We used my husband's recent re enlistment bonus in August for our CD and it has already gained $14....IN LESS THAN 2 MONTHS (ok so $14 isn't a lot of money, but it's money that we didn't have before that our money made for us, just by sitting there)!!!! We won't have to stress about money for the holidays, I will be able to take advantage of great deals (not just for presents, the holidays are great time to add baking supplies to your stock pile and of course all the after Christmas sales where you can get Christmas decorations for next year/candy for dirt cheap).


So try these tips. I know most of them sound like common sense, but that seems to go out the window when it comes to the holidays. Take a breath. Relax and put yourself in a position to ENJOY the holidays and not just "get through" them.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Kryssy's Saving Series Part 3: Non Coupon Deals and Steals

So I know it has been a while but it has been a bit hectic. I am 8 weeks and some change away from delivering my daughter and I also have the pleasure of dealing with gestational diabetes (makes me want to find that rude midwife I saw for my 24 week appointment that said I wasn't "high risk enough," to merit my husband coming home- throw it in her face and then punch her in said face). BUT as I was couponing away in Target today (gotta get my stockpile up before my c-section...because I will barely be able to walk, let alone go all over the store hunting deals), I realized I had totally space on this- so here are some routine non coupon (ok some of them may have coupons), money saving tips from me to you.

www.inboxdollars.com

This is one of those sites where you get paid for reading a bunch of junk emails, doing surveys, etc....But seriously- they no shit send you a check once you hit $30. I'm about to request my fourth check from them. And what is super awesome- they have coupons. And when you redeem coupons you print from their site- you get .10 for each coupons. With me- those dimes really add up. Most of us spend a ridiculous amount of time doing nothing on the internet anyway, might as well find a way to make some quick cash.

www.mypoints.com

This is another one of those "read our junk email and get paid," but that isn't where I get the bulk of my points from. I use it for the online shopping rewards. I spend a lot of money at Sephora. And with mypoints.com, I make 6 points per dollar spent at Sephora if I click through their website. Mother's Day flowers delivered? Yup I got points for that. Fruit baskets or gift baskets ordered online? Damn straight I got some points for that, too. I'm going to spend money there if I get the points or not, so I might as well get some points and use it for gift card out to dinner with my family.

www.groupon.com

I freaking love this site! I will go over it a bit more when I dive into the whole Christmas shopping year round thing in the next part. But I really do use this site all the time. We use it to try new restaurants with the $30 for $15 worth of food specials, I used it for our annual smog check, I used it to get my Burberry perfume and my philosophy miracle in a jar moisturizer for a fraction of what I normally pay. You want to save money on every day stuff? You want groupon.Livingsocial is ok, but not even close to the same league as groupon. You get lucky with Livingsocial sometimes but with groupon, you are rarely disappointed.

Victoria's Secret

Bet you weren't expecting to see Vickie's on here, were you? Their stuff is expensive, but my boobs and butt deserve it. Especially when I haven't personally paid for a pair of panties in YEARS. Why would I when Vickie's is constantly sending me coupons for free undies in the mail? Every couple of months, I get a free pair of panties and for the most part get my bras when their semi annual sale rolls around.

Panera

I just so happened to sign up for their rewards thing and now I get free stuff from them practically any time I go in the place. Pastry for my son, an iced coffee.....it's free and the food is good. Yes please!

Sephora

Now Sephora is known for "luxury cosmetics." Well I look at this way, I can either shell out what I need to keep skin healthy and pretty now...or I can shell out a helluva lot more in 15 years when I can't help but look like a leather shoe. Now I'm not saying that because something is expensive, it's better. I believe in using what works for you. When a new drugstore product comes out and there are coupons that allow me to get it for free- do I? Fuck yes! Do you know how helpful those little cleansing wipes are when you are exhausted and just want to go to sleep? There are quite a few drugstore skincare products I will use, which frees up my wallet to get the more expensive products that I need (like Philosophy's Hope In a Jar Moisturizer, or Boscia eye cream). With Sephora, you get free shipping if you spend at least $50, and if you are part of their rewards program- you get a deluxe sample when your beauty bank or points hits 100 and a super awesome gift if you wait and cash them in at 500. Plus with every order you get 3 free samples and there is usually a promo code floating around so you can get another sweet sample (I recently got a lip treatment from Fresh with my last order). The best way to try those more expensive products is to get a sample, see if you like and if you don't it was only a free sample. Plus I use their sales to get great stocking stuffers while building up my beauty bank and pocketing the samples (we will get to that later).

Free Credit Reports

This isn't so much a deal or steal, but it is a way to keep money in your pocket. With a good credit report, doors are just opened up for you. We (meaning me with my husband's blessing and power of attorney) just bought a car today, and the car dealerships were fighting over us trying to earn out business. Why? Because we both have great FICO scores, and we monitor that stuff.

Now everyone knows that legally, you are entitled to a free credit report every year. But there is a way that you can work it so you can basically keep tabs on your credit all throughout the year. When you fill out the information- you are asked to select your credit report from one of the credit bureaus. Sure you could look at all three at once. Or you could space it out- check out a report from each credit bureau every 4 months. This way you are able to keep tabs on your identity and your credit more often and safeguard something that can save you THOUSANDS.

There's probably more stuff I could list, but I have wacky pregnant brain. If something pops us again, I'll be sure to write about it. The next blog is saving money at Christmas!!!

Monday, July 15, 2013

Krystle's Saving Series Part 2: The Stockpile- Essential for Any Super Saver

So you know how to coupon, but now you want to take you savings even further. That is where the stockpile comes into play. The stockpile and couponing go hand in hand. In fact if you build up your stockpile enough, there will be actual weeks where the only things you will need to the market for fresh would be fruit/veggies and dairy. I can't even begin to describe how awesome my stockpile has been to my family. DEPLOYMENT is what primarily springs to mind. Most military couples can tell you that the first month or so of a service member's deployment can be trying financially. All that overseas/combat pay hasn't kicked in yet, but it doesn't negate the fact that the service member still needs stuff on top of the regular expenses the family still bears. There's the $100 for internet (which is a necessity! Although more and more bases are starting to offer free wi-fi, the smaller bases do not and the $100 is a monthly fee), care packages (shipped at a discounted rate if you use a flat rate box at the post office, although most of us usually spend about $50-$100 filling up that box), and of course whatever incidental expenditures that the service member needs to make. SO....when the budget was getting a bit tight, I was able to rely on my stockpile to cut food expenses,  take care of any toiletry expenses, keep my kid in pull ups at night as he learns to "hold it," and give an selection of things for me to send to my husband (he has also used the stockpile to send things to his friends when they were overseas as well). Not to mention the great feeling of being able to donate food to the local food pantries without breaking your own bank account.

The main food stockpile- my pantry.

FIND YOUR STOCKPILE LOCATION(S)

Where are you going to put your stuff? When you start stockpiling- it can take over your house! I have about  6 different locations in my house. In my kitchen in the main food stockpile in our pantry as well as an additional kitchen cabinet that is used for overflow from that stockpile (it does happen!)


Then there are two in the cabinets under the sinks in the master bath. The one under my sink is shampoo/conditioner/face wash/ face lotion and then all the girl toiletries (make up, razors, tampons, pads, body wash etc.)


 Then there is the cabinet under the husband's sink- guy toiletries, sample sized toiletries, toothpaste, tooth brushes and mouth wash


The overflow from these is in the guest bathroom (no picture) and I put all the toilet paper, paper towels, diapers, baby wipes, bottled water, and smelly stuff (candles, sprays for the house and all those smelly "are they decor or are they fragrance things?" that glade/airwick/lysol like to come out with every other week) in a closet at the end of the hall.

Keeping the stockpile divided like this helps it to not take over our house by being stuck in one location. Plus  they are in practical locations. Toiletries should be in the bathroom, food should be in the kitchen. Of course, MY stockpile is not YOUR stockpile. You have to live with it, so make sure it's how and where you want it to be.

INVEST IN A DEEP FREEZER

Once my stockpiling started to really take off, Kiel and I waited for a good deal on a deep freezer to keep in our garage. We found eventually found at Target and pounced on it. While all the dry foods and toiletries are the bulk of my stockpile- we can't leave out meats and frozen foods. I LOVE those steamer bags with broccoli and when they are on sale I buy them up! Plus I very rarely buy meat every time I go to the store. It's more so every 4-6 weeks to be honest. I'm VERY picky about the meat I buy so when it is on sale- I BUY IT UP, divide it in freezer bags with the date written on it and thrown in the the freezer, The freezer in the kitchen is pretty tiny so having a second freezer has been a godsend. PLUS what about all the fun frozen items? Like ice cream?! Last week Albertson's was having a great sale on ice cream and popsicles so I bought about 5 of 'em and keep the ones that we haven't opened yet, in the deep freezer.

Warning: MAKE SURE TO DEFROST IT EVERY FEW MONTHS!!! Kiel and I learned this the hard way. The frost built up had broken the seal and we ended up losing hot dogs, chicken, veggies and (GASP!) two corned beef briskets I had bought when on sale around St. Paddy's Day. Thankfully I paid less than $20 for everything in there, but it was a shot to my frugal heart.

Now on to building the stockpile...

This is where the hints from the previous blog come in to play. Look for sales, prepare your coupons. But there are a few things to remember when it comes to the stockpile-

IT'S NOT ABOUT WHAT YOU NEED RIGHT NOW- IT'S ABOUT WHAT YOU NEED...PERIOD

If I have a pantry full of Campbell's tomato soup- am I hurting for more of them? No. But that doesn't mean in a few more months I won't need them. Did I really need to do 5 multiple transactions at Walgreen's for diapers when I already had 5 packages of them at home. YES. Because I was able to buy those diapers for $3 a pack! And I have no idea if a similar sale would be going when I actually run out of diapers. So I pay $3 now and that means I won't have to run out and pay $10 for them later.

Every time we buy a new tube of toothpaste it makes us chuckle because we already have a lot of it. But I'm able to get that toothpaste for either pennies, for free or with an overage (when I'm basically paid to take it out of the store). So what's the point if we add another to the pile? It's not like I'm not ever NOT going to need toothpaste.

MAXIMIZE YOUR SAVINGS!

I know it sounds crazy paying money for coupons, but sometimes a coupon clipping service really is the way to go. I recommend The Coupon Clippers, because their prices are decent and the coupons will get to you quick.  They have a great selection of coupons, but if you are looking for which kinds to bulk up on, go for toiletries, dry pantry items (like chef boyardee, or barilla pasta), condiments, cleaners and paper items (like toilet paper and paper towels). You can also see about having some of your non coupons buddies giving you their coupons (when I was on the campaign trail, Joe Hogan, one of the Assembly members I was the CM for, used to give me the coupons he didn't use. Better he give them to me than to the recycling bin, right?)

RAIN CHECKS! DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK!

When certain stockpile items go on sale, don't think you will be the only person that is going to notice. You may walk into that store with your hand full of coupons and clean car ready to be packed full of goodies, just to notice the shelf has been cleared out. Ask the staff when they will get their next delivery. If it will be after the sale, ask for a rain check. A rain check is a piece of paper they will give you guaranteeing the sale price at a later date so you can come back and buy what you wanted at the sale price even if the sale is over. I also go to nearby stores and check if they have what I want to because some stores run out before other stores.

DON'T BE AFRAID TO ADMIRE YOUR STOCKPILE

I do it all the time :)

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Krystle's Saving Series: Part 1 Coupon Basics

Most of you that know me, know that I LOVE to coupon. I'm not like those hardcore people on "Extreme Couponing," but my couponing/frugal methods have saved my family a lot of money (we average about 50% savings overall), helped us through some rough times and just made our lives easier.



So I thought I would do a little series on my money saving tips. I thought about doing one big blog, but it's hard to just sit down and try to bang something out on a keyboard when you have a little one that constantly wants to play....or get into something. The series will go as follows;

1) Coupon Basics
2) The Stockpile- Essential for Any Super Saver
3) Non Coupon Deals and Steals
4) Christmas Shopping- It's ALL the time.

So let's get down to basics. You need to save money...or you just want to spend less money. You see all those crazy coupon people and wonder "How can I do it?" Now while it really isn't that hard, it does take a lot of time. During the last couple months of the campaign I was recently working on, I found myself running into CVS and Walgreens in between canvasses with an envelope full of coupons (and the shopping list written on the back) and would run in and out with my purchases for the week. When I'm not working, it's much easier to devote myself to couponing, but with only my husband's income- it's much more of a necessity. So let's get down to tactics:

PREPARE!
Stacks of coupons and circular ads don't mean shit if you can't organize them. Without organization, before you know it, your sales ads will be months old and you won't be able to find "that one coupon you need and know you have" (awful feeling, by the way). My suggestion is before you even cut that first coupon- find a place to put them. Some people like those little accordion coupon organizers, but I'm a fan of a binder loaded up with business card organizers and separated with tabs by category (frozen food, toiletries, dairy, cleaner, household, etc...). now the accordion organizers are tiny and can usually fit into a purse, which is a plus if you tend to forget things. I prefer the binder, though because I don't have to leaf through all the coupons in each little folder. I can flip to the section I need, and the coupons are all on display for me which is a huge time saver when I have a 3 year old that is getting fussy and a husband that likes to throw things in the cart when he thinks I'm not looking. So figure out which organizational system works for you and dive in.

CUT AND ORGANIZE
Pretty self explanatory.Cut your coupons from the paper, print them out online (I recommend getting an account with Inbox Dollars as they will pay you .10 for every coupon you redeem (you can also have them pay you for shopping you do, we will cover that later). And then organize them according to your preferred method. If you have kids, do this ASAP, because usually any slacking leads me to finding coupons I could've used months after they expired (usually hidden in a toy box). Some people organize every single coupon, but I know I'm not going to be using Depends or need cat items (because I don't own a cat), so I let my kid play with those. He likes to "help" and cut up the coupons.

CIRCULARS

Time to go through the ads! Keep in mind that grocery stores tend to have different sale dates (Usually Wednesday through Tuesday) than drugstores (Sunday through Saturday) so I usually wait until I have all the ads (which is by about Tuesday or Wednesday) so I can compare. The only exception to this is if I KNOW that what I see on Sunday is a good deal (like Purex detergent for 1.98-2.00 at CVS- if you see something like that- GRAB YOUR KEYS AND GO! THAT STUFF WILL FLY OFF THE SHELVES! BUY AS MUCH OF IT AS YOU CAN AFFORD! We will go over this more when we go over stockpiling).

So circle what looks like a good deal and compare. The biggest issue with this is that it will get easier and easier to spot a good deal the longer you coupon. Remember- just because a store says it's a deal- doesn't mean that it is. 3/12 when it comes to a 12 packs of soda is NOT a good deal, but stores advertise it like it;s the second coming of Coca-Cola (my personal max spending limit is $3 for a 12 pack- but I usually spend about $2.50).

Also, the longer you coupon, the more familiar you will become with stores you frequent. Target and Walmart are GREAT for using coupons that don't specify the size of the product, because they have a decent selection of travel sized products.  I also know that I can combine a Target store coupon with a manufacturer coupon and in this effect- double coupon (which is something a lot of stores don't do unless they are doing some promo thing...FYI- Albertsons lets you combine store/manufacturer coupons as well). PLUS Target's Cartwheel app can ass up to triple savings with some items!!! Make sure to get familiar with the coupon policies. How many like coupons can you use?  Is there a total coupon limit? This is stuff you will need to know once you start to heavily build your stockpile and your coupon arsenal.

NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS A COUPON IF IT'S A KICK ASS DEAL!

The Purex detergent deal I mentioned earlier- I rarely have a Purex coupon that coincides with the deal. But that's not going to stop me from loading a cart full of the stuff as soon as I see it advertised. Some people feel as though they won't buy anything without a coupon. I'm more of "It's a genuine good deal, who cares?!" Many people get tricked into using a coupon just because they have it, and while it does save them money, it's not getting them the maximum potential for savings. Because while the optimal deal is something that is a great deal that can furthered with a coupon, sometimes the deal happens and you don't have a coupon, but you know that it is a good deal. In fact, a lot of the best trips I'm made to the store (with 78% to over 100% savings) were more so the product of knowing what a good sale was combined with the store loyalty card and whatever coupons I could use. Sometimes the coupons themselves only accounted for about 20% savings while the store loyalty + sales made up the bulk of my savings. This is something that you will get better and better at the more that you do it.


This awesome haul was the result of % of store coupons, good sales and a groupon for frozen meals at Albertsons.

GO TIME! BINDER? OR ENVELOPE?

So you are at the store with your list. You have your kids in the cart and you are trying to focus so you can the hell out of there. Question; Do you bring your entire arsenal of coupons? Well that's up to you. Clearance sections of stores can offer MASSIVE savings (even potential money makers), but it is a treasure hunt. Sometimes I bring my binder, and sometimes I bring an envelope with the coupons inside and my list written on the outside. The binder is good if my budget for this time isn't super strict and ESPECIALLY if I have the luxury of going to the store alone, or if my son is in a good mood. If he is being a bit grumpy, I stick with the envelope because having a fussy kid with you when you are trying to focus on saving money at the store, should be an Olympic event.

Also- keep an eye on the register when you are checking out. Are the items ringing up correctly? You don't need to know what the exact total should be before you coupon, but it's good to have a general idea  Checkout is not the place for unexpected surprises. So before you leave home- do a general tally of what your total should be (try to make an excel spreadsheet of advertised prices - coupons and look at the total, with tax and such- it won't be an exact match but it will be close so you will know if something isn't ringing up right).

Next- swipe your loyalty card (if applicable) and hand over your coupons. Now believe it or not, sometimes the order you hand your coupons makes a difference. Do you have % off store coupon? MAKE SURE IT GOES ON TOP! If your pre coupon total is $50 and your after coupon total is $30 than have the 10% off total coupon scanned first is the difference between $5 and $3! Dollars absolutely count in this game! Also do a final check of the coupons before you leave home. Make sure they haven't expired, make sure you are planning to buy the number of items needed to use the coupon (some coupons apply to single items, others to 2 or 3). Details count! I have had coupons not work at checkout because of silly rookie mistakes like this, and then it throws off my whole total and just pisses me off. Don't make these mistakes!

I hope these pointers help you get started on your couponing journey. I promise the longer you do it, the easier it gets. Soon you will be able to recognize the ins and outs of saving money with just about everything you do and you be disgusted at the thought of paying retail for anything!

Happy Hunting!

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Deployment Crafts and my Kiel's Deployed Playlist

So my dear husband is getting ready to leave for his fourth deployment. Now he prepares himself for this 6 month suck fest differently than I do- bingeing on his favorite food, spending as much money as he can, making sure there is a current power of attorney and that our wills are updated, picking out pictures and Loki's artwork to take with him...stuff like that. I tend to do it a bit differently...I usually have about three moments in the two months leading up to a deployment where I will break down and cry (I've already had two, but there's still time), I try to do things to make it less difficult for Loki- last time we got him a Build a Bear with Kiel's voice on the voice box and a story book with a recording of Kiel reading the story, this time we got him a new story book (it's an Elmo one- and MUCH better than that awful Elmo deployment DVD we got from Readiness last time) and we built a deployment chain (we remove one link for every day that passes, by the time it runs out, Kiel should be home):

Another thing that helps is for me to have something to focus on while the hubs is away. First deployment was supposed to be school....but it ended up being that I got a job at chili parlor and got shit faced most nights with my friends (that stuff is allowed at 22). Second deployment I was pregnant, gave birth and taking care of Loki for 2 months. Third deployment I graduated college, got an internship at the DNC and took care of Loki. So what could I do this time?

YUP. That's what I get to focus on for the next six months.And technically- this is a craft because I'm making it and stuff. I'm currently 12 week so it'll be close when Kiel gets home (and I'm totally not afraid to have the Red Cross bring him home if it won't be close enough). I'm not doing the "going back home" thing again....it's a rough gig especially with a kid. Loki is going to move around enough during his life- we can stay in our current home for another six months. I have friends here, he has friends here and I know that our friends and EOD family here will help us pull through any issues we have. And yes, I stole the picture idea from Pinterest, isn't it hilarious?

But you know what REALLY helps me? A kick ass deployment playlist to listen to. Now some women fill theirs up with sappy love songs. Mine has a few, but not a lot- I don't need to be reminded about how much I love husband- when he's gone it pretty much eats a hole in my heart. It's a pretty eclectic mix, full of music that makes me think of Kiel, music I KNOW Kiel is listening to over there, music that pumps me up, music to listen to when I'm depressed and whatever the hell else I wanted to put on there. Here's the current list- in case anyone needed some ideas or wanted to swipe it:

Rocket Man (I Think It's Going to Be a Long Long Time)- Elton John
Wish You Were Here- Pink Floyd
Almost Easy- Avenged Sevenfold
Bad Company- Finger Death Punch
Burning Bright- Shinedown
The Deep End- Crossfade
Duck and Run- Three Doors Down
Every Day Is Exactly the Same- Nine Inch Nails
Gimme Shelter- The Rolling Stones
Hands in the Sky (Big Shot)- Straylight Run
I Will Not Bow- Breaking Benjamin
I Will Wait- Mumford & Sons
If I Ever Leave This World Alive- Flogging Molly
In the Air Tonight- Phil Collins (THIS SONG SHOULD BE ON EVERY PLAYLIST REGARDLESS)
Little Heaven- Toad the Wet Sprocket (BECAUSE WHAT WOULD BUFFY DO?)
My Hero- Foo Fighters
One- Metallica
The Show Goes On- Lupe Fiasco
Still Counting- Volbeat
Safe and Sound- Taylor Swift
Sail-AWOLNATION
Call Me- Blondie (ANY MILITARY WIFE WILL TELL YOU THE PHONE IS GLUED TO US                                  WHEN THEY ARE DEPLOYED)
Dancing With Myself- Billy Idol
Wait for Me- Rise Against

Also, if many of you notice that I start referring to the future (namely October and beyond) it's because I basically just kind of go on autopilot and get through this crap. Of course that might be different with a three year old and a spastic dog that I'm determined to train to not be such a weirdo, but I do notice that I laugh a lot less when Kiel isn't here. So please feel free to send me any side splitters you come across, because I'll probably be in need of a good laugh.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

SPECIAL EDITION- ASK A GAYBIE!

So today and tomorrow, the Supreme Court will be hearing arguments regarding gay marriage. Normally, I'm pretty thick skinned when it comes to politics, but gay marriage is something that I get a little more sensitive about. For me, gay marriage isn't about being "politically correct" or even about the growing public support for gay marriage both nationally and globally- it's about my family. 

(From Urban Dictionary:)GAYBIE: When two men or two women have a baby. Now one of the most repeated arguments from today was about how little "studies" there are regarding the children of gays- funny...because no one conducting a study every asked me or my sister for that matter. Of course I do get the occasional question and here are some fully authentic gaybie answers to some of the questions I hear the most:

1) If  your mom is gay- then why do you have a dad?            Well kids, not everyone sashays out the closet the moment they can walk and talk- my mom didn't come out until she met someone that made her realize she was in the closet. That happened after she had two girls and two marriages. My mom and my dad get along really well, my dad and step mom were even at my Moms' wedding in December. Not all gaybies have a dad or a mom in their lives- I do. 

2) Did your moms make you gay?           I am bisexual (which perhaps could be the argument for genetics- I'm half of my mom, my mom is a lesbian, 1/2 lesbian makes a bisexual? Could be.), but in my life's journey, I happened to meet my soul mate- and he's a man. We got married and started our own family. My moms never pushed for me to be gay, straight or any other orientation. Instead they pushed for....good grades, doing the dishes, finishing college, not getting so many speeding tickets and making it home by curfew. If it sounds like pretty boring, average stuff...maybe that's because it was.

3) What is it like?!          I have no idea how to answer this. Good, I guess? I don't have anything to really compare it to. I'm happy with my life. I'm very close to my moms, my dad and my step mom and my son is super close to them, too. Every now and then I would have to deal with some ignorant ass that would want to push my buttons and tell me how it's "against God's plan," or how "they are no better than pedophiles," (yeah, I've actually had someone tell me that) or that I would turn out messed up or wrong. Well my life isn't as exaggerated as the movie "The Birdcage." But it's not that different from my friends, either. And yes, it hurts me when people say mean things like that about my family, mainly because I spent 8 years in Christian school and know that these people are nit picking the Bible to single out a group of people because they are different and their differences are out in the open as opposed to behind closed doors. And to be even more blunt- all the hate and negativity from those Bible thumpers has actually made me severely question Christianity to the point where I can't even fully identify as a Christian anymore. My faith in Christianity used to be so strong, but engaging in fellowship with people who are so negative really pushed me away. My favorite Bible verse is 1 John 4:8:

"Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love."

My family knows love. I have never questioned my parents' love for me. EVER. We are a very close family. Someone that would try and turn the love my family shares into something wrong or bad and try to use God to justify it is doing our Creator and horrible mis-service. Not many kids grow up with parents they can tell (almost) everything to and as adults chat with them multiple times during the week, just because. Not many kids grow up knowing that their parents love them unconditionally, to the point where ALL of my parents flew across the country to take care of me during the birth of my son. Now, my family wasn't all peaches and cream. Our periods did sync up so one week out of the month was especially awful. We would fight, doors would slam, tears would be shed. Most of high school/ college, I wasn't really home much anyway (school, firefighting, boys, girls, whatever). But I NEVER questioned if my parents loved me or if they would be there for me. I didn't have to, I knew it then and I know it now. 

4) Am I normal?     Normal is a pretty dangerous term. I don't like it. I will say that I am happy. I have wonderful parents, and a family of my own. I have yet to have a dream I haven't at least attempted to accomplish (some have failed, but failure can be humbling at times).  I'm not a negative person and like to believe the best about everyone. I think those are good traits to have. I think I get those traits from my family. 

I guess my thoughts are pretty close to what Justice Kennedy said today about how kids of gays (gaybies) want their parents to be recognized. We DO need that. We need to know that our families are recognized in our country and that families like ours are being taken into consideration just as much as families with one parent or families with two hetero parents. Yes our country is facing a lot of issue right now- but NOTHING is more important that ensuring that our own citizens are being granted the freedom and equality that is guaranteed to all of us in our Constitution. 

Monday, February 4, 2013

Stuff I Stole From Pinterest

So one of the things I plan to do while Kiel is deployed, is getting balls deep into some interesting projects I find on pinterest. Yup. I'm putting a lot of eggs in the pinterest basket So here are some of the projects that I (with Loki's help and supervision) recently did and some details about each little project in case anyone else wants to try these. I also created a board on Pinterest that is specifically related to things Loki and I can do during Kiel's deployment so that we can keep Kiel as a part of our routine and hopefully make things easier for Loki (and me, I'm not going to BS, deployments don't get easier, you just get used to them and have somewhat of an idea what to expect). All of the deployment projects will get posted at a later date, being that we still have a more than a month before Kiel leaves.




Ok, so here is the first one (and yes, I was watching Nip/Tuck. Don't judge. Dylan Walsh and Julian McMahon just do it for me). We bought the towers for each side of the tv last year, because Loki gets into EVERYTHING and this gives us that whole height advantage where he can't reach it. But then we were left with this space and Loki would try and mess with the cords. So I saw a thing on pinterest, where you would make a tiny fence along the baseboard that would hide the cords and just look "oh so adorable!" Well I don't have that sort of time to make a tiny fence and for the most part, am all about instant gratification. So while I'm up in Loki's room, I see the extra side of Loki's crib that we had to remove when we turned his crib into a day bed. Maneuver the cords, line up the rail with the base board hammer in some nails and BAM! Now there is something to fill that empty space and keep Loki from messing with cords.

PROBLEM SOLVED. PROBLEM STAYING SOLVED.


So this  next one was pretty easy, too. The wine bottles up top were something I had been working on for the past year. I drank the wine, I stuck the bottles up top (it's like that whole thing most of us did in college where we saved booze bottles, except it's classier because it's with wine). And then I saw this thing on pinterest where you string lights along the top of the cabinets to add a nice glow to the kitchen. Well I tried it and it just looked dumb, so instead I weaved the lights (ya know- front of one bottle, back of the next and so on) and then attached it to a neutral colored extension cord and pinned it down with a hammer around the top of the cabinet (I didn't actually nail the cord, I put a nail in the wall close to the cabinet, and then put the cord between the nail and the cabinet, this keeps the nail close to wall and somewhat out of view).  It's easy and I love how it looks.


So this wreath, took a little bit of time a couple trips to Michael's (although they do have coupons and on Wednesday here in Vegas they do an additional military discount). The inspiration for it was because one day a few months ago, Loki decided to take a book I was reading and throw it in the bath tub full of water. My book was ruined. Now being I am addicted to books, I couldn't just throw it away. So I went onto pinterest to try and find a way to turn my ruined book into something new. I came across this. You start with a simple straw wreath, wrap it in burlap ribbon and then take the pages of your books and roll them into scrolls, securing with hot glue and twine (I quartered the pages to make tinier scrolls, you can also take three scrolls and tie and glue them together with twine to save time). Then glue the scrolls around the wreath and there you go! I used twine tied across the wreath with an additional strand of twine tied at the top and to strand running across (to keep it from "flopping forward") to hang the wreath as all of my nails were super tiny. The large ribbon is just a simple red burlap ribbon I found Michael's. I thought it was pretty so I got it. Loki loved helping me cut the pages and rolling the scrolls and he helped me pick a spot in the house to hang it and told me he liked it. Win/win.


And then there is the car Loki and I made. With Christmas and having to ship presents back home (we were on the East coast for the holidays), we had a lot of extra boxes. There will probably be a lot of crafts I post regarding cardboard boxes because I have a lot of them and they work so great for making stuff with the kids. The wheels/ steering wheel are made from paper plates. I had bought them for a recent dinner thing I had at my house, and I honestly don't use them very much (not very eco-friendly) so at least by using them this way, when Loki is done with this, we can break it down and recycle it. Loki and I colored the wheels and then I attached it to another blank paper plate (back to back so it would pop more). I used staples to attach them, just because it was the easiest to find and then attached them to the card board with regular ol' scotch tape. Loki loves it, I loved making it with him and it gave Loki a chance to work on his shapes (his circles are getting so good!).

Hopefully, I will be able to find lots more stuff to keep Loki and I busy while Kiel is away. At least with pinterest I have a bunch of ideas of things to do, and it's making my house a little bit more homey/cozy while I do it.